Sunday, August 29, 2004
Daily Grin August 27
The peaches are almost done, but the pears and apples are just starting to roll in and wild blueberries are now available! If you haven't already guessed it, I love this time of year for all the fresh veggies and fruits that are available. We had roasted veggies with supper tonite and I'll have some green pepper, sweet onion and taters fried up with my brekkie in the morning. Maybe I'll even make blueberry waffles! mmmmm.....
I had a very tasty t'mater sammich for lunch yesterday. Unfortunately, tomato and my tummy are not on speaking terms and I needed some TRolaids to get my tummy to stop screaming about the tomato sandwich. Don't you just hate when that happens??
Have something tasty and good for you today!! J
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Southern Word of the Day
Rah cheer - I was born rah cheer in town
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Wedding Preparation Guidelines
Announcement:
It is the responsibility of the bride's family to announce the wedding in the local newspaper. The announcement should include: A photograph of the bride (A high school yearbook picture is acceptable); Name of the groom, education completed by both bride and groom (do not include elementary school, unless that was the terminal degree.); current employment and planned residence after the ceremony (If living with the bride's parents, it is not necessary to specify where in the house you will reside).
Invitations:
Since you are having a planned wedding and you are expecting a lot of free stuff, you must send out invitations! They do not have to be lengthy. Something like "You are invited to watch John Smith and Jennifer Johnson make it legal on March 14, 2000." will suffice nicely. If you don't want to be so formal, you can always run down to the local bar and yell "If you aint doing nothin' on the 14th of March, why don't you stop by my house for a cold one about 2 o'clock. Me and Jennifer's having some friends over to watch the ball game and witness our weddin'."
Proper attire:
For the bride, the key words are "be conservative." No matter how good it may look, refrain from wedding outfits made with spandex or adorned with fringe. Excessive slits and dips also are frowned upon. This is not the occasion to show the world how big "they" are.
For the groom, a rented tuxedo is haute courture, but if it means the difference between going on a honeymoon and staying home, consider some alternatives. For example, a leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean work shirt can create a natty appearence. And though possibly uncomfortable, say yes to socks and shoes for this special occasion.
The ceremony:
No matter how urgent the event, loaded weapons have no place at the alter. At the point in the ceremony that says, "If anybody has any reason why these two should no be joined in holy matrimony..." tell the preacher not to pause too long, old flames sometimes die hard and talk too much.
Reception:
Remember to reserve the UAW hall far in advance, and avoid Saturdays, since that's bingo night. It is perfectly acceptable to ask guests to wipe their feet before entering the hall. After all the cleaning deposit can be the difference between an oil change and a full tune-up for the car.
When dancing never remove undergarments, no matter how hot it is!
Common wedding questions and answers
Q: Is it all right to bring a date to the wedding?
A: Not if you are the groom.
A: Not if you are the groom.
Q: How many showers is the bride supposed to have?
A: At least one within a week of the wedding.
A: At least one within a week of the wedding.
Q: What music is recommended for the wedding ceremony?
A: Anything except "Tied to the Whipping Post".
A: Anything except "Tied to the Whipping Post".
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